Thank You for Cornering Me

It’s been a roller-coaster week emotionally. Whenever I thought I’d hit rock bottom, I’d be proven wrong again. It doesn’t help that I’ve been holding myself back from indulging in self-pity, cos I just ended up feeling upset and frustrated, and feeling guilty about feeling lousy. Tonight, thankfully, You took things out of my hands. The dam (literally) burst and I gave up any attempt to rationalize. I’m such a silly little fool…to run all over the place seeking comfort when I should have gone straight to You. It’s really like the hymn says, “when those trials come my human nature shouts the things to do and (Your) soft prompting can be easily ignored”. It’s been so long since I’ve done this, I’ve forgotten how good it feels to just be still in Your Presence. Thank You for reminding me why I got to be so low in the first place… Timing’s rather perfect that it’s the beginning of Lent today. You’ve always had a way with timing, and with cornering me so that I could absolutely not ignore You. But do You always have to be this dramatic? Or maybe You know that the theatrics are soothing to me *sheepish smile*. Ah well. You got to me. Thank You. (And here’s my chosen Lenten prayer)

Prayer of St. Francis
Make me a channel of your peace
Where there is hatred let me bring Your love
Where there is injury your pardon Lord
And where there is doubt true faith in You

So grant that I may never learn to seek
So much to be consoled as to console
To be understood as to understand
To be loved as to love with all my soul