I Miss Toronto

It’s not a terrible kind of miss… partly cos I’ve been plunged into lots of activities since getting back. And it’s so great to see my family again, and to sayang my poor little injured brother and laugh at his corny jokes.

But I find myself talking about Toronto all the time. The food… the places… the people…

Everytime I receive an email from Melissa with all the pokes and squeezes and ‘mish you’s I smile and miss her.

And then just now, reading Wanting’s blog finally made me tear a little… the first tears I’ve shed since when I was in Cornell writing cards to her and Melissa.

Maybe it just hit me… that the era is over when there’ll be furtive knocks on my bedroom door because Wanting isn’t sure if I’m sleeping or not. When I go into her room and talk to her while she’s getting ready to go to work or to go out… when we laze in the living room with our butts too heavy to get up…

I won’t hear the doors of Melissa’s bedroom bang open and shut half a dozen times in the morning when she’s rushing to go to work… won’t see her in her purple PJs and Target bathrobe as she stirs her latest fish porridge on the stove.

They had a little surprise party for Mel’s birthday this week… and I think back on all the wonderful parties we had this past year. The Halloween Party… my ‘kiddy theme’ birthday, the Alice in Wonderland Tri-Birthday Party. :)

Yes, I miss Toronto very much. But I owe it to Toronto not to be too sad about leaving because it was there that I really learned that nothing truly loved is ever lost. And although an era is over, and that era was so wonderful, that in many ways was just the beginning. We may all be moving on to new phases of our lives at different paces, but as a very dear little ‘piggy’ friend keeps reminding me, nothing real has changed.

I look forward to the ways in which the friendships I’ve begun in Toronto will unfold over our lives. Every day will be hidden in the safety of God’s smile. :)

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I burst into tears during breakfast when I was telling Mom and John about this blog entry. Ha ha… John gallantly gave me ‘permission to cry’ while in his august company. And after I was done he actually asked me to cry again cos he said earlier I cried very entertainingly. :P How I love that little bugger!