To Be Nothing

Of what use am I if I am merely pleasant company to people and my company does not remind them of God?

My concern is not that people find me agreeable and comfortable to be around – no, my concern is rather that I stand in the presence of God at all times and that the Lord use me as he intends. If it serves his purpose that I am found to be pleasant and amiable, so be it. If it pleases God that I am to be obstinate and fiery, then so be it too.

I wish to live free – free from any attachment, both within and without me. Free from myself, and everything God has given me – especially my defining gifts and attributes. Let me be nothing and remember that I am nothing without the grace of God.

Lord, help me to live as nothing. Help me to be joyfully, peacefully humble and unafraid of any suffering, but to rejoice in bearing tribulation for the sake of Your Name, “Jesus”.

(Written in St Joseph Church’s Adoration Room in journal entry “My Heart Speaks”)