Humbled, Blessed.

Zibin, you sometimes jokingly complain that I blog about my friends, even John, more than I blog about you. And that’s because so often the thoughts I have about you are so intensely personal and emotional that an open and public space like this blog just doesn’t seem quite appropriate. And that’s why most of the time when you appear in my blogs it’s about something funny. But today, I’ve decided to break with ‘tradition’ because, well, you most definitely deserve at least one non-funny blog entry!

This decision is very much influenced by the overwhelming sense of gratitude and humility I felt this morning, when I called you and realized that you had rushed to my mom to help her bring Sol to the doctor, post-poning your long-anticipated dinner with your best friend. I know that this is a very small gesture for you – you who never hesitate to give of yourself to others. Yet, this small gesture on your part has touched me immensely because of how much it means to me.

I’ve always appreciated how you love my family like your own, giving above and beyond what any one of them expects of you. But especially now, with John in camp for most of the week, and my father away from home so much, I can’t tell you how grateful I am that I can depend on you to love my mom as much as I would. Being on this long-distance relationship with you for so many years, your love for my family when I am away has never failed to be a very powerful way for me to feel loved by you.

People often marvel at how we’ve managed to have such a flourishing long-distance relationship for the past 4-5 years. And though my standard answer has usually been ‘good communication’, today it suddenly struck me how much more than ‘good communication’ has been at work for us. Your unwavering support and encouragement for me in every dimension of my life – my studies, my friends, my family, my relationship with your family… has always given me confidence and strength although I so often take it for granted. The way you include me in your life, telling me about your day, the little updates and stories we trade…sharing our anxieties and hopes not only about our relationship but those we have for family and friends… all that, I suddenly realize today, is more than ‘good communication’. You make me feel cherished, needed, and loved, in so many little yet powerful ways, that this physical distance between us doesn’t seem much of a burden to bear.

Today, with all that I’m feeling this morning, I affirm yet again, that what I love you most for, is the same thing for which I first fell in love with you. And that is your amazing ability to love and care for others with such generosity of heart. And I feel so humbled and blessed that I’ve taken such a central place in your concern. Over the last 6 years, I’ve taken great joy and pride in discovering many other attributes maturing in you which I had not fully recognized before. I respect you, and admire you, from the bottom of my heart. And I can never praise or thank God enough for giving me a gift that I am hardly worthy of…but I promise that I will strive to be deserving of you.

There…let this little blog entry be a small testament of my gratitude and love for you. And I’m happy to share what I’ve written here today so that others may share in my joy, and perhaps catch a glimpse of the power that love can effect.

P.S. Hope you don’t mind yah that after this I’ll return to the norm of blogging funny stuff about you? :P