False familiarity

I may have offended quite a number of people through Facebook. I’ve ignored Friend requests as well as all manners of pokes, probes, sheep-throwing and some wall messages as well.

I may be out-of-date with the whole netizen whirl, but I still prefer my online interactions to be with people I know personally, and preferably, with people I actually have relationships with. I’m not interested in making new friends online. I’m not even that interested in re-establishing old relationships that were only ‘barely there’ once upon a time. What’s the point? I’m not going to put in the effort of maintaining such relationships anyway.

Why is it everyone’s so chummy on Facebook? When somebody you haven’t corresponded with for 12 or 13 years finds you there, they drop you a message worded like you’ve been in touch with them all this while. They even ask if they can visit you… when you haven’t spoken to them in all of 13 years and when you weren’t even that close before! … It makes it hard for me to phrase a response. Using words that mirror the cheery familiarity of the other rings insincere to me, and yet, it seems that’s what’s expected, isn’t it? More often than not I end up ignoring the messages or replying them once and then never again.

I find it disturbing to have to act in ways that do not reflect what I actually feel. I can be friendly, but I can’t act like friends with people who aren’t my friends. Maybe I’m using the word ‘friend’ here more selectively than a lot of people, but I really don’t like engaging in false familiarity. Why? Because it reeks of insincerity.

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Having said that, I’m in quite a good mood now cos I’m off to commiserate with a fellow student who is also v dear to my heart… and also because I’m heading to Ang Mo Kio on a little project I hope to do for a certain AMK kid. :D

1 reply »

  1. Haha… I totally agree with you Ann! I think a lot of times the requests to join in this game and that quiz is really driven out of a desire to gain more points with successful referrals and this is the whole idea behind facebook – to use the power of friendship to sell ideas and possible business opportunities. I thought it was nice to meet up with some old friends online, but I’m starting to think that facebook really is just another commercial hat trick.

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