When you’re married, it’s easy to settle into a comfortable but repetitive pattern of day to day living. Sometimes, a sudden change in rhythm can do wonders to inject a delightful sparkle when you don’t expect it.
This last week has been very bad in terms of Zibin’s work hours, and we’ve had some kind of social engagement or group activity the three weekday evenings that he was back before 10p.m. On one day, I was already asleep when he came home and still asleep when he left at 6a.m. the next morning. Then yesterday (Saturday), we had company during most of the day, and he had a wedding dinner to attend. It so happens that this week has been quite full of deep experiences and feelings that I wanted to share with him, but we were never alone long enough for me to do so.
It’s been a hard week for me too, having so little time with him. But then last night made up for all of it. It was a little past midnight by the time he got home from the wedding dinner, and we were both pretty tired. But he was bursting with things he wanted to share with me and we ended up talking animatedly for another 2.5 hrs.
We talked about what it means to be an idealist in a jaded world and about what it means to find purpose in a career apart from how high a salary or career ending point it may afford. We talked about remaining genuine amidst an environment of flattery and networking, and about the insights into the organization’s concerns that new appointments and promotions provide that remind him not to judge superiors or ‘higher-decisions’ too quickly.
My husband’s face was alight with conviction and passion as we spoke and I couldn’t help feeling like I was falling in love all over again. Here was a man I respected deeply for the purity of his heart and his passion to live by Christ’s principles no matter what an oddball it may make of him. He is burning with an ambition that has nothing to do with career progression or income but has everything to do with becoming a wiser, stronger and kinder version of himself through life’s tests. I feel privileged to be at his side to help him fulfill the destiny and purpose that God had created him for.
We fell asleep still practically nose to nose, with our hands clasped between us. And as sleep overtook me, I slipped into it with a song in my heart and a smile on my lips as all frustration from the past few days dissolved into nothingness.