How few there are who accept failure and weakness, who are content to see themselves on the ground and to be found there by others.
What does it say about the state of my soul when your love burns me like fire? Your kisses crucify me and your embrace send me into agony. It is not God’s will that a soul be disturbed by anything or suffer trials, for if one suffers trials in the adversities of the world it is because of a weakness in virtue. The perfect soul rejoices in what afflicts the imperfect one. – St John of the Cross I am afflicted, Lord. […]
It’s that time of the year again. In a week’s time it will be the Sec 4 Confirmation Retreat for our parish. Every year, this weekend retreat is the spiritual highlight for many of our youth – both retreatants and service team members. For many of them, it will be at this weekend that they have their first significant God experience or have a much needed re-encounter with God. But just like Peter in the Transfiguration narrative, many of them will have […]
I seem to continue to lose things that I once prized. I seem no longer capable of thinking up witty double entendres, sophisticated philosophical syllogisms or profound and complex theological reflections. Not that I had ever been particularly good at doing these, but I used to be able to at least play the game. It feels as if the intellectual capacity I once had is slipping away, and with it, any real hopes of completing my PhD studies. A part of me feels […]
Wonder what God has in store for me this Lent?
Every time I visit my grandmother, I have to walk past brothels. My grandma has lived in that neighbourhood for nearly 60 years, long before it became a red light district. She cannot bear to move, and so I have gotten rather accustomed to ignoring the rows of men that line the street in her neighbourhood gawking at and waiting their turn with the skimpily dressed women who come in and out of the brothels. But today, when I walked down that […]
During the Eucharistic Prayer He asked me, “What grace would you like to ask for? I will give it to you.” Just like He had asked Solomon. I must ask wisely. “Wait,” I told myself. “Don’t be hasty. This is important.” As I went up for Communion, it suddenly hit me. THIS was my birthday present from Him – Him in the flesh. I was overwhelmed. I received Him with trembling hands. Back in the pew, on my knees, with tears streaming […]
“Out of the darkness of my life, so much frustrated, I put before you the one great thing to love on earth: the Blessed Sacrament… There you will find romance, glory, honour, fidelity, and the true way of all your loves on earth, and more than that: Death: by the divine paradox, that which ends life, and demands the surrender of all, and yet by the taste (or foretaste) of which alone can what you seek in your earthly relationships (love, faithfulness, […]
“Do whatever he tells you,” Mary said. And when Jesus asked them to fill the jars with water, they filled it to the brim. Do I go the distance? When I say, “Your will be done,” do I really mean totally and completely? Totus tuus. Yes, fill me, Lord. Your will be done. To the brim.
It has been like this for some time, I cannot remember how long now. This strange, unfamiliar yet growing sense that I am losing my taste for things. My senses, when it comes to most external things, seem to be getting duller. More and more I prefer silence and rest to stimulation and excitement. And what used to thrill me before now feel like I am tasting them through a layer of cotton. Music. Entertainment. Good food. Even good reading. Ideas. Intellectual […]